Watch And/Or Listen to This: Bruce Springsteen’s Rejected Harry Potter Song

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“Cause there’s no class to teach Defense Against the Broken Hearts”

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Watch And/Or Listen to This: Meg Myers’ “Motel” on Conan

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Where has Meg Myers been my whole life?
(P.S. I love the sneakers.)

Watch And/Or Listen to This: Puppy Conan V

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I’d like to adopt them all.

Watch And/Or Listen to This: Scooter Tonight

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Here’s a segment from Conan from a weeks ago that I’ve been watching over and over. Can’t go wrong with dogs doing people things.

Watch And/Or Listen to This: Ty Segall’s “Feel” on Conan

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I mean, seriously? How is this real?

The Collected Madness of Alex Trebek, Volume 11

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Alex Trebek is starting to lose it, and as a public service, I will be posting all the evidence of his insanity.

47. Skrillex, whose name is Yiddish for “toxic pig skin”, became deaf in his right ear while probing a human embryo with the gas-powered congresswoman

48. Oops! Bruce Willis butt-dialed my mother-in-law saying, “Och, bring over your mother & go outside & dig up some tatties”

49. Currently the top 10 baby names for Jewish girls include Inchworm, Happy Nuts, Flimsy Puss, Caterpillar Smokes, Brown Sugar & Desert Dweller

50. Hugh Jackman is a hairy man with one saclike body cavity that looks like an older dog with thick fur who was put to sleep for making a fool of himself

51. OMG! A self-absorbed carpet soaking yoga instructor squeezed out a humorously small sausage equivalent to 1/60 of a belly button

52. The ex-president of Ukraine, James VanDerBeek, often massages weasels in order to extract this foul-smelling waxy secretion that has bridge engineers all over the world screaming, “Whassup!”

The Collected Madness of Alex Trebek, Volume 10

Leave a comment

Alex Trebek is starting to lose it, and as a public service, I will be posting all the evidence of his insanity.

42. Tony Stark builds an armored suit to help Helen Keller escape from Guantanamo Bay in a snowstorm

43. Bill Clinton said that women make the best stink-hole shower gel because they can scrape off the hardened pork like the old-fashioned stuff you’d spread on with a can opener

44. During the George W. Bush presidency, the Secret Service taught drama to fat little pro-slavery bullfighters in preparation for a war with the single-breasted turkeys

45. British people drink snake venom when suffering from alcoholic rage; in the U.S. we tie up a dogie, hoof it across the dance floor & spit. Wow, that’s so weird — I was just thinking about Michael Jackson’s daughter

46. Oh my gosh! Rosie O’Donell’s dog took a crap in her mouth. It helps boost the immune system

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